An open letter to Huggies
Elliott came down with a bit of a bug yesterday which meant I got to spend a much higher percentage of my day at or around his changing table. As I changed him over and over the smiling character of Simba from The Lion King on the front of each of his Huggies began to look more and more like it was just taunting me. And eventually I got to thinking. Why does every disposal diaper in existence have some form of childish cartoon character on it? I understand that the obvious answer to this question is that it is a basic marketing technique and is brilliant from Nickelodeon's standpoint to have a parent looking Dora the Explorer in the face 10 times a day.
But, from the diaper manufacturer's standpoint, I think they're missing the boat somewhat. No parent makes a decision on what diapers they buy because of what goofy character happens to be on the bag. And, obviously, for at least the first two years of a child's life, he or she is incapable of even comprehending or caring about what insignia he or she might be wearing. After the age of 2 I completely understand a child wanting a superhero or a princess on his or her diaper. When I was little I used to try and convince my mom that I had miniscule cuts on my fingers just so I could sport G.I. Joe Band-Aids.
But I would like to submit that, for the first two years of a child's life, what's on a diaper should be marketed to the parents. So, from a male perspective, and as the primary diaper changer in my household, here's my idea. Sports-themed diapers. It's simple and brilliant. If my San Francisco Giants drop a crucial series to the hated Los Angeles Dodgers, what could possibly lift my spirits more than waking up the next morning, getting Elliott out of bed, changing his first diaper and having the ungodly mess that he has created overnight be laying right on top of a Dodgers logo? And you could even kick things up a notch. How about a picture of Manny Ramirez on the seat? If you think I wouldn't shell out an extra buck or two to make that happen you're crazy.
Got a big bet down on the Super Bowl? Your kid's going to go through a pack of diapers in that two-week layover. And what could be better than having your kid push a little bad karma onto the opposition? And during a slow time of the sports year? I might have a hankering to pick up a package of Ben Roethlisbergers because, if anyone deserves to have their face crapped on, it's him. Perfect for Father's Day or a great stocking stuffer.
Now I know that men are not the primary diapers buyers in the market. But I think this can work across gender lines and could be very topical. Every season on The Bachelor there's always that one bitchy, horse-faced girl who sticks around week after week for reasons no one can understand. Kind of annoying right ladies? Would it make you feel any better to strap a picture of her onto your child after your kid has just eaten an enormous bowl of blueberries? You bet it would. And is there a celebrity who recently cheated on his or her significant other? Sounds like it's time to rush some Jesse James diapers into the market. (We've got your back Sandra.)
I searched the internet to see if my sports diaper idea in particular had already been taken and... it has. Kind of. Check this out.
Seriously guys? That's the best you can do? First of all, the skunk on both the front and back of the diapers implies that, in fact, both Boston and New York stink. Second, your favorite team, presumably Boston in this case, is still getting peed on. And third, the logos imply that while Boston is "No. 1" they also imply that, while not as good as Boston, New York is still second best. Amateurs. (Also, according to the website, it sells 12 of these diapers for $32. Yikes.)
I realize now that this post makes me sound far more like Andy Rooney than I intended. ("What's the deal with diapers? I wore them as a baby and now I have to wear them again!") But, as with many of my other half-baked ideas, I think I'm on to something here. So if anyone out there is friends with an executive from Huggies or Pampers, put them in touch with my people.
What a great way to start my day - with a very good laugh! I love your idea and actually think it could work but unfortunately, I have about as much business acumen as a plant. Good luck with this!
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could you get personalized ones with say your brother's face on it as well????
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Your check is in the mail.
Thank you very much,
Pampers Inc.
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FANtastic article. Fortunately there is no such thing as bad publicity.
It seems that we need to work on communicating the humor and the use of double entendre when we display #1 on the front of a sports diaper and #2 on the back of a sports diaper.
Yes, #2 means New York is 2nd best, but it also means they are Poop (which is kind of the point).
Since we currently do not have a license agreement with any sports teams, we are not authorized to use the actual logos. So FANnie (the skunk mascot) was created to help illustrate the type of sport and the #1 and #2 concept.
Our hope is to someday be able to grow the business enough where we could afford to use a team logo and improve the marketing appeal.
We have submitted the concept of displaying #1 and #2 on the front and back of a diaper to the US Patent Office, and are awaiting their decision. The invention is currently in the Patent Pending stage, which means nobody else can use this idea without our consent.
If Huggies or anyone else is interested in improving and growing this business idea with us, we are always interested in your ideas.
Thank you so much for your thoughts.
Jay D’Auria, CEO
Bottom Line Products LLC
Jay.Dauria@FANnies-us.com
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